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Women Share Feelings of Being Dismissed

The goal of Women Living Better is to take what women share with us and make it available to all women going through the menopause transition so they feel validated and not alone.

Each of the women quoted below shared their stories because they hoped it might help others — so awesome! As you’ll see they wrote to express their gratitude but also conveyed their stories of frustration, struggle and feeling dismissed.

I just want to thank you for this initiative. I wish I would have known about this several years ago. I searched the internet, talked to my doctor, talked with my husband and felt completely alone and desperate for answers. I was 43 when I first experienced many of these side effects and perimenopause never crossed my mind. My doctor assured me I was far too young and “all your blood work looks fine”. Yet all along I was experiencing massive mood swings, heavy periods and night sweats. So, again, I say thank you for talking about this “forbidden” topic of discussion among us mid-forty-year-olds. — Jackie M.


I am now 53 and I have been suffering from what I call, perimenopausal insomnia, since my early 40s. I too was dismissed by my doctor and tried many sleeping and anti-anxiety medications to help me sleep. This prescription trial and error happened for over 7 years, and unfortunately, nothing worked! Then I saw a gynecologist for a year, and still, nothing worked, even with trial and error hormone therapies.  My doctor even told me to “stop reading, and just trust her”, but after 7 years of trial and error, I lost trust and felt like I had to do my own research. 
Finally, I started feeling some relief when my periods started skipping, several months at a time, and then, by keeping good sleep tracking records (I kept a daily sleep journal for over 3 years), I realized that the insomnia periods were related to PMS (10-15 days/month, before and after my periods).  I slept better, during the months that I didn’t have a period. Eventually, after a year of skipping periods and having some relief, my periods finally stopped at age 52 and I am sleeping much better now, and I feel like a normal person again!
I literally feel like I have my life and my happiness back!  I can’t tell you how “sick” I felt when I was chronically sleep-deprived! [It] was affecting my work, my short-term memory, my social life, and my family life…basically, my quality of life was suffering for years! — Lisa C.


When I had the onset of many of these symptoms I was freaked out and had no idea what was going on. My female doctor was basically no help, said I just had to deal with it and I shook my head. 
I am really glad that you mention a mindful practice as that is also a major helper… I make sure to work out at least 5 days a week, it is critical to my well-being and generally many of the workouts are yoga-related. The yoga practice really helps with stress, breath control which in my opinion can really help regulate your mood, it has helped me with lack of libido and of course has gotten my body in the greatest shape it has been since I was young…..which helps confidence and overall physical and mental health. If any of the above can help anyone I think that would be great. I felt alone and a little scared when it all started happening and you are right there is basically no support out there. — Nykki M.

Here women share experiences with sleep disruption.

 

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